“I’d be lying if I said it wasn’t hard to do this interview, but it’s important these things are said because lads our age don’t talk about it enough.”
I’ve been best friends with Chris, not his real name, for five years. But it wasn’t until a drunken walk home after a night out, that I got to know the real Chris. He told me he suffered with depression.
“I remember it vividly; I just felt I needed to tell you how unhappy I’d been. And I trusted you.”
Chris told me what his depression feels like: “I told my counsellor it’s like losing your mum in a shop as a kid but not being able to shout for her or ask anyone for help.”
“There are still times I sit in bed and just wish I never existed.”
He looks uncomfortable as I bring up the subject of his parents:
“They know some parts and know I’m getting help now, but it’s hard to bring it up with them because I’m petrified of them feeling guilt about something that’s not their fault. So I keep a lot to myself still.”
Chris is in his 3rd year studying history in Sheffield. Although enjoying life at university, forming new meaningful relationships has been tough.
“My biggest fear is everyone looking at me differently or treating me differently, there’s only a handful of people who know at the minute but I’d like to speak about it more in the future.”
Chris is a reminder that a stigma still surrounds depression and causes many to suffer in silence.
Here are a few helpful websites: